29 January 2011

Sexism 101 or 'I do not think it means what you think it means, boys'

First things first, you guys are awesome! Thank you for the lovely, kind responses to my last post. You guys rock! I'm so glad I'm sharing this blog with y'all. And I shall certainly take those recs XD
Secondly, this has been a week full of raaage with regards to British/all men and their take on sexism. I don't know if you guys have heard about the Andy Gray scandal, but if you haven't a quick rundown:
(Warning: trigger warning for general sexual harrassment; have only mentioned it on the off but just in case)

Off camera (which is why everyone's getting all up in arms), Mr Gray and a colleague were discussing the merits of a female ref. Of course, it was as faily as you'd imagine. Cue 'offside rules' joke etc. That doesn't really bother me. What DOES bother me is his reaction to Karen Brady's comments about facing sexism in her workplace: 'Do me a favour, love.' I'm sorry? Are you, A WHITE STRAIGHT MAN who has NO EXPERIENCE of anything other than being top of the social chain, 'correcting' a woman on her experiences? SERIOUSLY? Fuck. You.
Later, after another incident of his sexually harassing a woman on camera, he is (thank the lord) sacked. Now, of course, all these men are wailing 'IT'S JUST A JOKE. Lighten up!' Or 'reverse sexism. How come all ladies can make jokes about guys being stupid?' Um...not the same thing guys; your privilege is showing. I am facepalming so hard, because these attitudes? They affect us, as women, because we are continuously undervalued for our achievements and told to 'lol, stay in the kitchen'.

Fail No. 2. (and this may potentially be triggering for rape survivors, I'm warning you now)

The False Rape Society. A blog on the internets. There to help all men harmed by rape allegations. It just boggles my brain, quite frankly, but these bloggers are consistently enabling the rape culture that pervades society. So a hearty FUCK YOU to them. Because EUGH. Just what the world does not need.

I hope y'all have a great weekend (apologies for lateness of post; I didn't get home yesterday until after midnight)


  1. Fuck you, in return. On behalf of all men and boys and, yes, even some women, who are wrongly accused of sex crimes.

    By the way, we loathe and detest rape. A lot of rape victims write to tell us how they, too, loathe and detest false rape accusers. Every rape lie diminishes the integrity of every rape victim.

    Thanks for enabling the rape liars by painting us as some sort of rape apologists.

  2. Sorry, no. Do not even PRETEND that you're on the side of rape victims everywhere. By making it about the men accused, about everyone falling victim to false accusations, you are making it that much harder for rape victims to bring their case to justice, even report it to police. Because your blog? Defending men? Is society's initial gut reaction, whether the accused is innocent or not.
    Say what you want, you're still enabling rape culture.

  3. Thanks for the libel. We don't pretend that everyone is falling victim to false accusations, you fucking cesspool. I would love to debate you sometime for a laugh. I follow this issue very, very closely. You obviously don't. Didja even hear what the head of RAINN said at the Specter hearings about the reason for underreporting? Didja read what the Stern Review said about underreporting?

    Don't try to argue with an expert. But thanks for giving us a great illustration of true man hating.

  4. AND LOLLLLLLLLLING at 'man hating'. Yeah, OK. You know what? You guys are giving me reason to hate men.

  5. Hm. The Stern Review where the conclusion is that false reports of rape are statistically very rare, and anecdotally extremely rare, and when such reports do occur, they are aggressively prosecuted and punished? The one that suggests doing further studies to lay to rest any exaggeration, on either side? That Stern Review? This review right here?

    Yeah. Read it. Did you?

    Specter hearing? The one titled “Rape in the United States: The Chronic Failure to Report and Investigate Rape Cases”? That hearing? The one where Berkowitz' sworn testimony includes this statement:

    "...[F]alse impressions seem to still be held by a critical minority of agencies. Ideas like: a large percentage of reports are false — a perception that is clearly contradicted by FBI data and can create a toxic environment and affect the initial treatment of victims."

    Yeah. Read it. And?

  6. False rape accusations are damaging for two major reasons.

    1) On a microcosmic level, they fuck up certain individual people's lives. That sucks.

    2) On a macrocosmic level, they cast doubt on every rape case ever, and every single one that gets publicity makes it that much harder for the next woman to be believed. That REALLY sucks.

    Serving the microcosm at the expense of the macrocosm is tempting but ultimately damages the bigger picture at least as much as it un-damages a particular little picture.

    It's important to take every accusation and defense seriously. In a non rape culture, we might be able to take them equally seriously in an unbiased way. That's not a world we live in; we live in a rape culture, where most people think defenses should be taken far more seriously than accusations at every stage. Highlighting cases where the defenses were correct would help in a society that took accusations too seriously. In our own, is unnecessary.

    That's purely ideological, leaving out the sheer numbers game and the fact that false rape accusations make up such a tiny percentage. That tiny percentage should be heard. No problem; everyone's tripping over themselves already to hear them. No need to give them a microphone.